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Taking time to think is only a small portion of the task at hand, thinking about where your decision would lead to in the long run is the complex obstacle.- MatthewAndrew Burgos-Garcia

How I Feel At This Point In Time. =/

when i first realized that i am in love with you, i took long walks for about 2 full weeks everyday just to think of how amazing it would be if i held you in my arms or just thinking about your smile and personality, and it warmed my heart and gave me this tingling sensation throughout my body and frankly, i have to admit i love that feeling and thinking of you. its like what krytonite is to superman or what a feast is to the famine. But like often we get into these little things thats sort of like an arguement but not really because i hate to argue, and one of us gets immature -_-. If you really love me be straight up and speak your mind, if i really love you i will do the same. Usually i listen to my younger siblings who have already been in a relationship or their take on it, or even a friendship scenario, but right now i have to think for me. Im 18, Pocket full of scholarships and acceptance letters, but the only thing pulling me back from even thinking about college, is my life. I havent had the chance to explore the world the way i want to explore it rather than just going on trips around the world that relates to business and im not going to college for a year so i can do so. But the only thing keeping me from moving out is; if i move out, will i have someone to stay with me through the night when im scared? and thats where i stop because like everything was perfect it was all planned out, graduation, move, college, yada yada and now its like we cant even have half of the convos we used to have...well we can, but to me it just doesnt feel the same. I know i love you im 100% positive of that but i feel like theirs something im missing. I want to get closer to you and even call you, but i cant and that gets you mad but its like, it gets me mad as well. Its not like im purposely holding you off or anything everyone knows i have eyes for you and my heart is for you but your just not getting it, people, events, and all of this other dumb shit gets in the way like me not having a phone? Idk is that something to get mad about? Probably but really....i wont even say it you guys know where im heading with this one. I just wanted to say that i love you and what ever the future holds for me, all depends on what happens, life is a game of chance so lets flip the coin and see what we get, we either dont, or do. 50/50 chance for either one. Just hang in tight im trying to at least :(( and dont let go plz. i wont no matter what anyone says. This entire blog might be random and pointless to you but it just sums up what im feeling right now i felt like putting it onto something and im trying to save paper due to the bad enviroment. SAVE MR SPLASHY PANTS!!

Best (Worst) Day Ever

So today i wont up kind of happy because i had an interview with a magazine and i was in the city so i was going to make it a special day for steven. I got through with the interview at 2:13 and my mom calls me on my brothers phone telling me i have to pick her up from the airport, so after arguing with her for 15 mins i realized i had no choice really. Story Mode: So im driving all the way back up to WCA, cause this bitch wants to be a bitch and im reaaaallly heated i mean im ready to kill because today was supposed to be a special day like i put steven through a lot of shit in three months and hes been a really good friend or w/e you want to call him 0_o these three months or w/e, so as im driving back up to westchester in this furious rage and like a dick head i decide to stop at a redlight to text but i went over the line where you stop so im like at the middle of the street and wham! i get hit. i swear i thought i was dead i cant even think straight right now but everyone is worrying and i need to keep you people updated before you go crazy. im just shocked right now to be honest im shaking like hell and i dont want to talk. but im fine the cut on my leg got worse but i'll be ok. and my car is wrecked but i have insurance so she'll be okay too. i just feel like an ass right now though, everytime i try to do something for steven, bad things happen. am i not getting a sign god is trying to show me? idk -_- i just need to sleep for once, just need to sleep i was already stressing over this love triangle, hexigan, octogon, polygon, w/e the hell you want to call it and i have been sick as a horse. thats it i guess i just need to relax right now. I only love one damn person! if i told you to get off my dick than get the fuck off! 

The day you kissed was my birthday -_- i hate when i have time to think

Give A Poet A PEN

i think i should start a holiday called give a poet a pen day lol i have to think about how people celebrate it first -_- i'll get back to you guys

Los Fronters

WEll im sitting up in the house looking down out my window, and i see something shine. It couldnt be me because im defanitely not outside and the stars arent out yet. so as this bright object comes closer i began to see a face. and yes i did recognize the face but the brightness is what is unfamiliar. its funny because this kid who is giving off this bright imploration is the same fucking kid who hypocrizes every fucking thing i do saying this like : "being a poet is for soft niggas" than turn around and wants my poetry pin to wear it to a poetry slam -_- and "yo i knew you danced but ballet nigga plus your in the drama club? come on you mad soft" than asking me to teach him how to demi-plei and perform monologues at talent shows. and the dumbest shit he ever did was say "yo andrew how do you win rap battles, you have the worst flow in the world, even if you hide your accent you still a bubblegum wrapper" hence im the one who introduced him to that fucking term! and the crazy thing is he goes around telling people im the illest rapper to date. like he dead ass said that shit! but back to the story. so i take a closer look at what is shining so bright and i notice its a ROPE CHAIN! waaait whoa back the fuck up. i technically brung that shit to my wack ass school and have been wearing it since before i went to that school and i didnt think it was a big deal .on january 14 2007 this kid made me feel like shit for wearing a huge ass rope chain to school which caused me to get an even smaller rope chain than he added "old school is wack if your gonna wear a rope chain just go retro" and this dude is outside my damn window with a huge ass rope chain and worn out ass cargo pants, a hawaiian shirt and a du-rag? dead ass dude? SUCK MY DICK! if your a fronter or a hypocrite. admitt that you love my style and want to be like me and i will PERSONALLY! mentor you my dude its nothing you'll be bagging in no time lol. (i dont bag) but really everytime you call me soft, its a compliment because people are attracted to ruffnecks and i consider myself to be one but if me doing or acting a certain way makes me soft, than so be it. im soft enough lay on top of your sister.


Style, Character, Appeal

3/14/09

i've been 18 for an entire month and its a big deal for me. a lot of things has happened within that month as some of you may know. so since this blog is open to the public, i just wanted to like let you guys into my mind and whats going on as much as possible. so being that i am 18 and have been 18 for a month! i can honestly say im waiting to have sex and wanting soooo badly. i mean im a laid back person and i dont want to rush anything, but damn -_- just damn imma be honest im sorry i really want some. im not that desperate to just "do" anyone, of course i want a specific person lol. but like i can wait as long as he wants me to wait. im just saying i want some lol. i feel like a fiend right now. i heard its not that special, or exciting as it seems but i want to be the judge of that. seeing how my life is going i dont want do die a virgin -_-. thats about it i guess im in North Carolina reciting plays to myself until i fall asleep alone in this dark empty room so. holla at me. see you soon new yorkers. and everyone else, i'll just...yea..peace! P.S. Man i miss michael!!! -_-" [dont get jealous or angry. i miss other ppl too] But michael most ^_^ [<< mad head]





With a thousand sweet kisses, I'll cover you