so i couldnt sleep last night because im feeling kind of shitty. i was going to this show i guess in manhattan with my brother and cousins but we kind of left my cousin hanging. so its like she sort of deaded me because she wont tell me if she went or not or what happened so im like shaking inside.my little brother went, but showed up at the wrong location so he just went home without telling anyone so that made me paranoid. i mean i guess its partly my fault for not giving her the money to buy the tickets but im sorry i forgot. so i just said fuck it and decided not to go. which is kind of fucked up because i can only imagine how nervous she was.my little brother is home with me now, but i didnt know where he was for hours he turned off his phone and i was so worried.i guess now im like a parent figure since my grandmother is gone and i should like take care of them or at least spend time and console them because shes gone, and thats what i want to do. but now i just feel shitty for being bad kinfolk. im just a shitty brother/cousin and i should die. :( IM SORRY GUYS.IM SORRY.
Family, Struggle,Stress
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